The Netflix show stunned and horrified us in 2021. But have you ever wondered what it would look like had it been set in Ireland?
Most of us have finally gotten over the Squid Game phase of Netflix. Still, we can’t help but ponder what games we might play if we were fooled into playing at home in Ireland.
After racking our brains, we’ve come up with five childhood favourites that we think would make the cut if the deadly game were to reach the Emerald Isles.
So, without any more delay, here are the games they would play if Squid Game was in Ireland.
5. What’s the time, Mr Wolf? – a perfect starter game
This is a great game to start with, as it works best with a large group, not unlike the Red Light, Green Light game from the nail-biting TV series.
The premise of the game is simple. One person takes the role of Mr Wolf and stands at the top of the play area with his back turned.
The players stand at the other side of the play area, taking steps whenever the Wolf calls the time. When the Wolf calls “dinner time”, the players must run back to their safe zone.
You know what we’re thinking; it’s a race to get back to the secure area before getting shot, of course. Alternative idea: they get fed to actual wolves.
4. Conkers – a classic Irish game
Conkers 100% has to be a game they would play if Squid Game was in Ireland. This is a great one to cut the opponents in half.
Everyone picks a partner and is equipped with a conker on a piece of string. They must then go head to head, taking turns hitting each other’s conkers.
The loser is the one whose conker is destroyed first, and, well, you know what happens to the losers in this game.
We think the perfect ending is to throw the losers off the top of a horse chestnut tree.
3. Kerbs – a right of passage for Irish children
Did you even grow up in Ireland if you didn’t play kerbs? Two teams, two kerbs, one ball. Simple.
Each team member takes turns launching their ball at the opponent’s kerb, and if they hit it, they get to take a shot closer to the kerb for extra points.
Miss the kerb and run back to basecamp, but if the other team manage to hit you with the ball on the way back, they get all your points.
The winner is whichever team has the most points at the end of break time.
We think a 30-minute timer should do the trick to adapt to our Irish Squid Game. Losers get their heads smashed between a kerb and a cinder block. Too much?
2. Stuck in the mud – one of our favourite games takes a turn for the worse
Stuck in the mud, hands down has to be one of the games they would play if Squid Game was in Ireland.
In this classic chasing game, whoever gets tagged gets ‘stuck’ in the mud until someone crawls under their legs to free them.
To liven things up a bit, we think whoever is stuck after the 30-minute timer runs out gets thrown into actual mud, except they’re not getting out.
This is a perfect opportunity to make use of our agricultural background. Silage pit, anyone?
1. I am the greatest – handstand your way to greatness
This is one of our all-time favourites. Banned in schools across the country, but not banned on the list of games they would play if Squid Game was in Ireland.
I am the greatest is a game of pure stamina and is relatively quick. Basically, whoever is left after the previous war games has to engage in a handstand competition.
Whoever is the last person standing on their hands is the victor and the sole survivor of the Irish Squid Game.
So, there we have it. Five classic games that would be the leading contenders in an Irish Squid Game.
What would the name of our games be, do you reckon? Conker Game? Kerb Game? Let us know your ideas in the comments.
