Downing Street today confirmed that British Prime Minister Boris Johnson is to seek political asylum from the Irish government.
The announcement was made just as UK Supreme Court ruled that the suspension of Parliament was unlawful.
The surprise announcement has come as quite a shock to not only the British public but is also reported as leaving the Irish government reeling.
As a Downing Street Spokesperson for the soon to be former prime minister said, “Boris is no fool. He can see the writing on the wall — he knows he will probably be the shortest-serving prime minister ever to have held office.”
“I mean,” the spokesperson continued “if the courts don’t jail him or the public doesn’t lynch him Her Majesty the Queen will probably throw him in the Tower for treason.”
“No, honestly the only way out for Boris is to catch a ferry to Ireland and throw himself at the mercy of the Irish immigration service.”
It is believed that the soon to be former prime minister and leader of the Conservative Party feels that he will be welcomed in Ireland with open arms.
“He’s not looking for much,” the spokesperson confirmed. “Just a small little cottage in Connemara would be perfect. There he could eke out a living cutting a bit of turf and doing the odd car-boot sale. And anyway most Connemara men have that wild hair and wilder look in their eyes — I’m sure Boris would fit right in.” She said.
It is believed the soon to be former prime minister initially sought political asylum in France — the French are still laughing at the proposal.
Disclaimer
This article is satire. Articles in this section are spoof articles which should not be taken as the truth, nor are they are intended to offend. However, if you are offended, please inform us formally via a letter. You can ensure it gets to us by placing it in the nearest recycling bin.