Sinn Féin to Take Up Westminster Seats In Response To Brexit

The Sinn Féin Party headquarters announced today that its seven elected members to the Westminster Parliament will abandon their abstentionism policy and attend to vote in the English House of Commons.

Sinn Féin’s policy of abstentionism dates back to 1918 and is based on their principle that they should not be forced to swear allegiance to the Queen and the legitimacy of British authority in Northern Ireland.

Speaking at a press conference held in SF party headquarters at Parnell Square Dublin, Party President Mary Lou McDonald told reporters.

“In light of the current situation surrounding the Brexit negotiations and the resulting bedlam now overtaking English politics, we feel the time is right to take a more active role in the House of Commons.

“We as a party that represents the entire Island of Ireland feel at this stage, we would be better off inside the tent ‘looking’ out rather than outside ‘looking’ in.” McDonald said.

“We have always resented and opposed Westminster’s claim to legitimately govern parts of the North. However, it has become very apparent that the English Parliament is now incapable of governing England — not to mind Ulster, so that policy is fairly redundant at the present.”

Increased Funds for the party

“On another note,” McDonald explained, “We would envisage a great financial gain to the Party when our MPs take their seats.

“Yes, we appreciate the millions we have received through the ‘representative’ monies scheme brought under Tony Blair’s government. But — and let’s be honest here — that extra funding from seven MP salaries would come in handy. Times are tough.” She sighed.

Oath of Allegiance

Mrs McDonald was then asked about the oath of allegiance to the Queen.

“Oh, we’re not too worried about that.” She purred as she batted her eyes to the cameras.

“Let’s face it again, an oath of allegiance is simply a glorified promise and whoever believed a politician’s promise?” She asked the assembled press.

“Anyway we will instruct our MPs to cross their fingers while taking the oath, so it wouldn’t really count, will it?”

A DUP observer at the press briefing was at this stage throwing up into a wastepaper basket and the time of going to press unable to comment.