Fine Gael announces plans for the Ireland to Rejoin the British Commonwealth

A spokesperson for Fine Gael announced today that the Fine Gael led government intend to prioritise moves on Ireland’s re-entry into the British Commonwealth.

Ireland or Eire as it was then, exited the Commonwealth on 18 April 1949 when The Republic of Ireland Act 1948 came into force severing all formal ties with the British Crown.

Sustained Applause

It is believed that Fine Gael’s move is a direct response to a suggestion from the DUP’s Jeffrey Donaldson that Ireland should join the Commonwealth which was met with applause at Fine Gael’s National Conference.

Mr Donaldson made the comments while sharing a stage with senior representatives from the SDLP, Alliance party and Tánaiste Simon Coveney.

The Monarchy

A Fine Gael spokesperson told reporters. “As a Party Fine Gael have always been great believers in a monarchy.

We have strong links with the Crown; in fact the Taoiseach has sent a lovely gift to the Duke and Duchess of Sussex on the occasion of the latest royal birth.

Ever since the War for Independence we have always set out to disassociate ourselves from the Fianna Fail ‘The Republican Party’ line.

I mean let’s face it we all watch Coronation Street and Britain’s Got Talent, don’t we?” He asked.

The Advantages to the Nation

A Fine Gael press release was circulated to various news agencies detailing a number of advantages to Ireland rejoining the Common Wealth, which included.

The FAI being absorbed into the FA thus ending the current ongoing debacle.

The rejoining of the Commonwealth would also ensure closer ties with Downing Street and a distancing from Brussels, thus removing the onerous need for diplomats to learn foreign languages.

Ant or Dec

The Spokesperson concluded with. “Personally I think it’s a great idea. We could go back to having a governor. Perhaps Nigel Farage or either Ant or Dec. Seriously, Lads it would be great. Wouldn’t it?”

The Fianna Fail leader Micheál Martin was dozing in the Front Benches and unavailable for comment.