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You are at:Home » News » Top 10 best Richie Kavanagh songs, RANKED
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Top 10 best Richie Kavanagh songs, RANKED

Grainne KavanaghBy Grainne KavanaghJuly 25, 2022No Comments4 Mins Read
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Known for his witty songs full of saucy humour, there’s no denying that Richie Kavanagh is a brilliant entertainer.

Every Irish person will know of Richie Kavanagh’s hilarious songs, chock full of innuendo to make anyone laugh until their sides split.

However, the one problem with this brilliant songwriter is that he has so many songs that it can be hard to choose which ones to listen to.

That’s why we’ve decided to list the best Richie Kavanagh songs, to save you the time fretting over which one to throw on next.

10. The Mobile Phone − oh, my girlfriend has a mobile phone

The Mobile Phone song is one of the best Richie Kavanagh songs.
Credit: Facebook/ Richie Kavanagh

A classic from the 90s, when mobile phones were few and far between. Poor Richie was tormented, though, as his girlfriend had one, and she was glued to it 24/7, leaving him lonely for his love.

Richie’s website tells us that more people have mobiles today than toilets, and the average person unlocks their phone around 110 times daily.

9. The Pothole Song − now they call us holy Ireland, great big potholes everywhere

Another banger from the 90s, a time when potholes were in style on every road up and down the country.

Our man Richie wrote this tongue-in-cheek number in mockery of the Irish government, who were seemingly doing nothing about the state of the roads.

8. The Battered Sausage − oh, batter on the sausages an’ batter on the fish

The Battered sausage song is one of the best Richie Kavanagh songs.
Credit: commonswikimedia.org

If there’s something we love in Ireland, it’s deep frying things in batter. The humble battered sausage inspired this song about a man biting into one and realising it was a battered mouse. Full of porter, he devours the thing whole. What’s not to love?

7. Pulling Their Wire − they were pulling their wire higher and higher

This is a very ‘innocent’ song dedicated to the ESB men of 1955. A note on Kavanagh’s website outlined that in the 1950s, The Rural Electrification Scheme was ongoing.

This scheme brought ESB men into rural areas across the country for weeks or months at a time, resulting in many new courtships and, in some cases, marriages in the remote regions of Ireland.

6. Fagans Chipper Van − would you like a little sausage? I’ve a lovely little sausage

The Chippy song is one of the best Richie Kavanagh songs.
Credit: imdb.com

This is one of the best Richie Kavanagh songs. You’ll love this song if you’re a fan of the brilliant Colm Meaney film The Van.

All about a man who does up a chipper van to sell chips outside a pub. Sure, what more could you want from a song?

5. A Ride on a Tractor? − did you ever get a ride, ever get a ride, ever get a ride on a tractor?

Another beautiful tune full of saucy innuendos, including such naughty lyrics as “did you ever pull your balls, ever pull your balls, ever pull your balls at bingo?”…how bold. It had to be on the list of the best Richie Kavanagh songs.

4. Everybody Wants My Fanny − everyone is out to get my fanny; everybody wants to see my fanny

The lyrics are always this mad!
Credit: Facebook/ Richie Kavanagh

Another riské number indeed. Richie Kavanagh definitely has a recurring theme in filthy little numbers that will leave us laughing every time.

3. Chicken Talk − f**k-f**k-f**k-f**k-f**k-f**k-f**k-f**k-off

There’s a reason why this one has over 20 million hits on YouTube. This is a cheeky way to get away with saying the f-word. Listen to the song, and you’ll find out why. It’s only the sound the chicken makes!

2. My Girlfriends Pussycat − oh, me girlfriend has a pussy, a lovely pussy now

My Girlfriends pussycat is one of the best Richie Kavanagh songs.
Credit: Flickr / Nikita

Can he get any bolder? This is yet another one full of sexual connotations. We can’t get enough of these rowdy little numbers. The sauciness makes this one of the best Richie Kavanagh songs out there.

1. Aon Focail Eile − aon focail, tú focail, trí focail eile, and I not know no focail at all

Of course, the number one song had to be the one that shot the man to stardom. For non-Irish readers, the word ‘focail’ sounds alarmingly like a particular f-word in English.

The chorus basically translates to “one word, two words, three more words, and I don’t know any words at all”. It’s all about the suggestion of the swear word that makes this one a huge success.

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Grainne Kavanagh

    Gráinne is an Irish writer who is utterly obsessed with her country. She grew up in Kilkenny and 'matured' in Waterford, where she got a Bachelor's in Theatre and English. She is now based in Dublin, where she has recently received a Master's Degree in Librarian and Information Studies. Her favourite things to write about include travel, satire, good news, cinema, theatre, and mental health. She previously worked as a film critic for the Waterford News and Star newspaper. Gráinne also works as a pet sitter, so she can usually be found in someone else's home, cuddling their dog.

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