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    You are at:Home » News » Satire » Irish café’s ‘pint-sized tea’ draws crowds of Irish mammies, leading to long queues
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    Irish café’s ‘pint-sized tea’ draws crowds of Irish mammies, leading to long queues

    Jade PoleonBy Jade PoleonNovember 7, 2023No Comments4 Mins Read
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    Galway café has a new tea trend, and it is drawing in big crowds of Irish mammies.

    Irish café's 'pint-sized tea’ draws crowds of Irish mammies, leading to long queues.

    A new Galway-based café has targeted a niche which no one has attempted before by offering their customers – specifically Irish mammies, the option to grab a ‘pint-sized tea’, and the best part is it can be ordered as a takeaway.

    Irish people are well known for their love for tea and for the fact that in Irish culture, tea rules all and tea cures all, and now Galway café ‘Bean There Drank That’ has chosen to serve up the unthinkable – pint-sized tea to help Irish mammies go about their day.

    Bean There Drank That – Galway café popular with Irish mammies

    As we know, the Irish aren’t the type to do things by halves, so of course, the new offering, which targets Ireland’s niche ‘Irish mammy’ market, was anticipated to be a hit – but it was much more than that.

    Forming long queues through Eyre Square and beyond, word spread that Bean There Drank That has added the new beverage option to their menu, and Irish mammies across Galway and surrounding counties showed up to show their support.

    Elaine Carey said, “I’ve travelled from Dublin for a pint of Irish tea. Galway has always been one step ahead of Dublin in many ways, which is not available there”.

    Another Irish mammy further back in the queue expressed her gratitude to Bean There Drank That for coming up with this concept, which will give mammies more energy.

    “I’m delighted someone has finally caught on; we have been advocating for the pint of tea for years, and we are sure this will give us a spring in our step”, she said, adding, “I hope more cafes catch on to this; it will save Irish mammies around the country”.

    Irish guards called in – extra help needed to tame café queues

    The pint-sized tea is a huge hit with Irish mammies.
    Credit: wikiwand.com

    While it is excellent news that Irish mammies finally have access to dine-in or takeaway pint-sized tea, word has spread, and the queue has become so long and disruptive to other businesses that the Irish guards have had to be called in.

    Local business owner John Downey reacted to the enormous queues outside his tattoo parlour Inkaholics.

    He said, “We think it’s a fantastic idea; of course, we all have Irish mammies, and they deserve their tea, but the over-excited screaming and shouting outside my tattoo shop is just outrageous”. Adding that Irish mammies must keep the noise down, or they will frighten his customers away.

    Irish guards have been called in to bring order to the queue, prompting the Irish mammies from across the nation to keep the noise to a minimum.

    The café has also had to bring in extra staff to make tea faster, better and stronger to get the crowd moving, and while the demand for the new offering is fantastic, owner Brian Foley has admitted it’s gotten a little out of hand.

    “It’s much more than we anticipated, and we have had to call the guards in to help us control the crowd, as we all know Irish mammies and their tea can be a risky combination”.

    Other cafes react – a new Irish trend?

    Galway City is well known for its cafes, and neighbouring businesses are worried that all their Irish mammies’ customers will be taken away by Bean There Drank That.

    To try and combat the potential disruption to business, local café owners have been forced to come up with an alternative pint-sized drink, but to no avail.

    Bean There Drank That spokesperson has stated that while they will potentially draw in the Irish mammy crowd and may take away from other businesses, they are sure they made the right decision regarding adding the pint-sized option to their menu.

    When it comes to business, you have to take risks sometimes, and we are sure that this move will bring about a pint-sized tea movement to cafes worldwide – if they’re brave enough to accept the challenge.

    Brian said of the movement, “Irish mammies are a tough crowd, and it takes a special kind of café to make tea the right way, to satisfy the crowd; they can be brutal If it’s not made right”.

    He added that if he were to advise other cafes planning to offer the ‘pint-sized tea’ option, they need to be ready for screaming crowds and long queues, and they will go through a lot of tea bags.

    For now, the Irish guards have the chaos under control, but as the movement unfolds across the country, only time will tell how the rest of the country reacts to this new offering.

    READ MORE: Irish mammies sent to Syria in UN peacekeeping role

    Disclaimer

    This article is satire. Articles in this section are spoof articles which should not be taken as the truth, nor are they are intended to offend. However, if you are offended, please inform us formally via a letter. You can ensure it gets to us by placing it in the nearest recycling bin.

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    Jade Poleon

    Jade is a seasoned traveller, yoga enthusiast, adventure seeker and travel writer passionate about seeing the world and sharing hidden gems with others. As well as having travelled to 91 countries thus far, she has written for several websites, including The World Bucket List, Meanwhile in Ireland and Ireland Before You Die. In 2022 Jade’s first book ‘ The Ultimate Irish Road Trip Guide’ was published and is currently available on Amazon. She is a keen writer of satirical articles, as well as ‘The best things to do’ and ‘The best dishes to try’ around the globe. Jade is currently on a campervan adventure around Europe, where she continues to get her travel and food inspiration. She is excited to share what she discovers with her readers.

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