The Dark Hedges are to be no more, and here is what is in store in 2023. Opinion will be divided on the call.
Game of Thrones fans will be in utter shock when they hear that the iconic Dark Hedges, a famous film location in Northern Ireland, will be given the chop in light of new multi-million hotel plans.
However, while the news may anger many, others are excited about the recent changes to come into effect within the next couple of years.
Since the row of big trees is merely seen as a “waste of space” and “overly touristy” by locals, they would rather see the land being used for something more glamorous and less cheesy. So, if you haven’t heard the news yet, let us unveil what’s about to go down.
A popular tourist attraction– Dark Hedges to be cut down
For those who are avid Game of Thrones fans, the sight of the Dark Hedges is one that certainly needs no introduction.
Still, for others who may not have seen the show, this stunning avenue of beech trees, located along Bregagh Road, captured the attention of directors who have used this location for their hit HBO show many times.
Since the show aired in the United States in 2011, it has become a worldwide sensation, with fans jetting off to various parts of the world to step foot in real-life filming spots.
As well as filming in Iceland, Croatia, and Morocco, many parts of Northern Ireland have been chosen to be part of the show and have become instantly recognisable.
While this may be an excellent thing for putting the region on the map, locals are outraged at the sheer volume of people that turn up at ungodly hours of the night to take photos for their social media accounts.
Address: Bregagh Rd, Stranocum, Ballymoney BT53 8PX
Local reactions – many are delighted with the news
One local man, Tommy, said, “I’ve fond memories of riding my bike up and down the road as a child, but now with the crowds of people there all the bloody time, it just ruins it for all the locals.
“We would much rather see them cut down instead of having to deal with seeing them making bloody TikToks and Instagrams every hour of the day”.
Other locals have suggested the Dark Hedges be cut down and replaced by palm trees to give the area a more tropical feel, while others have suggested charging an entrance fee to see the imposing trees, which were planted back in 1775.
While both of the suggestions, and many more, have been considered, it has been decided that a new luxurious multi-million hotel will be built in replacement of the trees, which will bring money into the locality and provide great amenities for the region.
Joan, a local to the nearby village of Armoy, is delighted with the news and said she is looking forward to seeing the glamourous new hotel, which is rumoured to be named ‘The Boulevard Golf Resort and Spa’.
What’s in store? – changes are coming to the region
So now that the plans are firmly in place and the contracts have been signed, we can share exactly what is in store for the area now that the Dark Hedges are to be cut down.
What was once known as ‘Kings Road’ from Game of Thrones will now be replaced by a six-star golf resort and spa, the first of its kind on the island, and builders will get underway as soon as the last of the trees are felled.
The said hotel will cater to those looking for a luxurious stay, with the finest suites as accommodation and a private butler on hand for each guest.
Plus, there will be a host of incredible amenities such as a floating gym, in-room breakfast chefs, a mini replica of Niagara Falls as well as a golf course which will put all others to shame. Did we mention that the hotel will be shaped like the Louvre in Paris? Just stunning!
Last chances – the beginning of the end
While many of the Game of Thrones fans and stars of the show are disappointed at the news, with many fans taking to the streets in protest, the owners of the up-and-coming hotel have released a statement.
They say, “While we understand that people are upset about the changes, we are sure that their minds will change once they see what we have in store, and it will be much better than a load of ugly trees”.
So, if you are a fan of Game of Thrones, you have until January 2023 to see trees in all their glory before they entirely disappear and the building begins.
This article is satire. We do satire articles because it is great craic and Irish people love it! Articles in this section are spoof articles which should not be taken as the truth, nor are they are intended to offend.