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    You are at:Home » News » Satire » Guinness-infused cologne line to hit shelves in time for Christmas
    Fake News Satire

    Guinness-infused cologne line to hit shelves in time for Christmas

    Jade PoleonBy Jade PoleonOctober 9, 2023No Comments4 Mins Read
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    It has been revealed that a new Guinness-inspired cologne will be launched this Christmas, and the nation couldn’t be happier.

    Guinness-infused cologne line to hit shelves in time for Christmas.

    Guinness has well and truly become a symbol of Ireland for many reasons, and this year, Guinness is launching a never-before-seen product that will bring a smile to faces across the country.

    A new Guinness-infused cologne line will hit shelves nationwide in the lead-up to Christmas so you can kiss goodbye to your cheesy Calvin Kleins and Old Spices this year.

    Here is what you need to know and how to get your hands on the best cologne of the year.

    The Irish and their Guinness – more than just a drink

    Suppose there is one thing that the Irish love about Dublin, apart from the vibrant atmosphere of the Temple Bar district and the wide variety of mouthwatering eateries, it’s the smell that wafts through the air outside the Guinness Storehouse at St James Gate.

    Since 1759, Ireland’s iconic stout has become ingrained in the culture in more ways than one, and there are many things you might not have learned about in your history class that might surprise you.

    Throughout the years, Guinness was not only a stout to be consumed, but it was also something that eligible bachelors doused themselves in to win over the ladies – and it worked.

    The smell of Guinness and its magical infused aromas are the reason behind many love stories and marriages. Now, with Christmas 2023 just around the corner, there is a massive surprise in store for Guinness enthusiasts.

    Rumour has it that matchmakers of Ireland also used Guinness to bring couples together and form everlasting relationships. It did the trick, and now every Irish man can have a go.

    Eau de Stout – just in time for Christmas

    Available just in time for Christmas.
    Credit: pexels/ monicore

    If you are searching for a unique gift for the man in your life this Christmas, you will be delighted to know that Guinness has FINALLY launched a Guinness-infused cologne called ‘Eau de Stout’.

    While the nation has been suggesting this fantastic idea for years, Guinness has never caught on, yet in 2023, they revealed that the new men’s cologne will hit our shelves in time for Christmas and will come in the iconic shape of a pint.

    While the smell of the new cologne will bring about a sense of nostalgia, it is also said that it will strengthen relationships and ensure eligible bachelors will have a good chance of wooing the ladies.

    Guinness lovers have always known that the iconic Irish stout has had unique benefits, but now the proof will be in the pudding.

    Describing his love for Guinness, local man Eamonn Murphy said, “Ah sure I’ve never owned one of those expensive Calvin Gabannas, why would I, when I can sprinkle a bit of the black stuff on meself”.

    “It’s pure magic!’, he added. Only time will tell how the nation reacts to the new cologne this festive season when they can finally get their hands on it.

    Guinness-infused cologne to hit shelves – an unbeatable gift

    Sherry Dunne, behind the launch of the new Guinness-infused cologne, is just as delighted as the rest of us. “It’s definitely been a long time coming, and we all know the traditions and magical love powers of the Guinness aromas, so we are delighted to get it out on the shelves”.

    It has been revealed that shops stocking ‘Eau de Stout’ this festive season will include Boots, The Perfume Shop, and, of course, it will be available at The Guinness Storehouse in Dublin and Dublin Airport.

    While we are not sure of the sizes that will be available or the price range yet, Sherry Dunne ensured that there will be plenty of exciting options for Irish customers.

    Whether that means gift sets or massive discounts, the details have not been revealed, but one thing is for sure: there will be queues all across the country once ‘Eau de Stout’ hits the shelves.

    Guinness has revealed that the face of the new cologne will be none other than Louis Walsh, and we couldn’t think of anyone more suitable.

    So, with Christmas 2023 approaching, the nation will have all hands on deck, not to miss out on getting a bottle of ‘Eau de Stout,’ as Guinness has also revealed there will be limited stock until 2024.

    If you are looking for something special for the man in your life, this is a gift opportunity you certainly won’t want to pass up. Here’s to a Guinness-infused festive season.

    Disclaimer

    This article is satire. Articles in this section are spoof articles which should not be taken as the truth, nor are they are intended to offend. However, if you are offended, please inform us formally via a letter. You can ensure it gets to us by placing it in the nearest recycling bin.

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    Jade Poleon

    Jade is a seasoned traveller, yoga enthusiast, adventure seeker and travel writer passionate about seeing the world and sharing hidden gems with others. As well as having travelled to 91 countries thus far, she has written for several websites, including The World Bucket List, Meanwhile in Ireland and Ireland Before You Die. In 2022 Jade’s first book ‘ The Ultimate Irish Road Trip Guide’ was published and is currently available on Amazon. She is a keen writer of satirical articles, as well as ‘The best things to do’ and ‘The best dishes to try’ around the globe. Jade is currently on a campervan adventure around Europe, where she continues to get her travel and food inspiration. She is excited to share what she discovers with her readers.

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